Questioning

I spend a lot of time wondering about things like...what is freedom really? Is it when we feel safest or when we are taking risks? How much of what we do, what we decide, is actually decided for us? Why don't we seem to trust our neighbors to make good decisions but think the government can fix everything? Aren't they just people too? See what I mean? Always wondering...

I AM WORTHY

This is one of those times that I wish I wouldn't have added that last thing. I think I like the pencil better than the yellow paint....oh well. I promised myself I would stop being afraid to make mistakes.

Feeling Insecure

This spread is actually green and the pink is closer to white than pink in real life. I don't know why it photographed like this.

I'm having one of those nights where you need reassurance but you just are not going to get any. And it came out of nowhere. Yes...it's hormonal, but as you know, that doesn't make it any less real. I always regret when I react to this emotion.

Yena'ad Aleik (Happy Birthday)

Supposedly "yena'ad aleik" means happy birthday in Lebanese. Ben took me to celebrate my thirty fifth birthday at my favorite Middle Eastern Restaurant, Mazza. This is my birthday spread. The torn up pieces of paper that I've written on are actually from the craft paper that he wrapped my gift in. And the picture on the left at the bottom, is a photo of the dining area of the restaurant. The typed words above it are the dishes that we ordered, cut from a menu that I printed from the Internet. ...Hummus, Vegetarian Grape Leaves, Lamb & Rice Dolaa, Chicken & Potatoes Mutabbak and of course some delicious Lebanese wine. I had a wonderful time.

Bewitched

She's grateful for your friendship because you brought her back to LIFE and you expect her to be whole...

♥ red ♥

I thought I would take my first real attempt at drawing and painting a girl(or anything) ....ever....in my life....and journal her.

I think she looks like she's dreaming of an adventure.

moving right along...

One of my resolutions this year is to make my spiritual life a priority by finding and implementing authentic ways to worship Jesus Christ and reach new levels of sacred intimacy. I’m approaching this relationship like I would that of a lover, I want the lines of communication to be open, I want our love to be both comfortable and fresh but most importantly, I want it to be real.

2008 was parched for me on the spiritual realm. Going through the motions of church life left me feeling void of any real depth of soul. Somehow, somewhere a connection was not happening. I started to feel boxed in and burdened by my beliefs instead of set free by them. Church, as comforting as it can be to be around like minded people at times, can be so milk toast and void of uniqueness or color. How can I have a personal, individual relationship with Christ - that is my own exclusive relationship, in a ‘one size fits all’ environment? I can’t, I need my alone time with The Lord. I need my own stamp, my own personality, my own creativity (or weirdness) or whatever. Anyway, I have always been fascinated by religions and rituals and I have decided to take the things that appeal to me from other religions or denominations and apply them in my own world, creating my own form of worship. I don’t believe that God ever intended us to be a bunch of robots anyway, do you?

MY USB CORD IS WORKING!!

I'm participating in Misty Mawn's journal entry a day project for January but my cord hasn't been operating so this is my very first post. It's not exactly pretty but that is kind of what I like about it. This spread was inspired by the book "Women Who Run With Wolves" as were the poems that I wrote on the pages.

FEMALE

Alive- me
A living, breathing creature
Woman

Therefore, I am growing-still.
Feed me
Give me drink
Nurture the dreamer
Encourage the soul
Prune only what has become too heady
Allow me my instinct
For I am most beautiful, when left wild

Shifting gear...This is the painting that Ben gave me for Christmas. I had a hard time getting a decent photograph of it because it's HUGE. It gets different reactions I'm sure, but it reminds me of freedom, isn't that weird? The first time that I laid eyes on it, and every time that I've looked at it since, I think about what life will look like for us if we keep passing law after law in the name of "safety" and "security". Maybe it's just me...

Stacey's Candy Dishes and My Random Thoughts

So.... my USB cord won't work on my camera. That's why I was unable to complete December Views (WAH!). I was jonezin for a post though so I decided to swipe a picture from my sister's blog (http://collagecafe.blogspot.com/) These are candy dishes that she made by collage on martini glasses! They're splendid are they not?!

I have several new spreads in my journal that I want to upload as soon as I have a working USB cord. I definitely want to post more this year. Yep, more posting and more journals. Especially more journals!! JOURNAL LOVE!! I'm so consumed by this art expression. I don't know how I have survived so long without a creative outlet that is visual like this. It's been extremely therapeutic for me. The entire process acts like a sedative to my soul. It's a weakness worth having.

E~♥